Don’t be a tool.

Europe is currently in full Music Festival swing. Every possible weekend sees the gathering of a vast array of fans coming together to partake in some open air festivities. Regardless if the festival is genre aligned or it’s a tasty little smorgasbord, there always seems to be a random mix of punters getting suited up in their pre planned festival attire that you just know they have been planning since they clicked that ‘Purchase Now’ button.
There are many individuals who go to these said festivals and are generally not narcissistic, trend whoring, incorrect lyric screaming nuances, but chances are, these lot flock to the fields like a bunch of alcoholics merging in on happy hour.
Below is a list that i have compiled that for some reason, people, think are ok to wear amongst the masses. That said, i have in the past rocked one or two items to a public event that now, in retrospect, seem like a terrible idea. But i was young and naive and not fully aware of my sheepish ways. Now that i have a fully formed brain and personality of my own i feel like it’s my duty to bring to light just where these people need to go home and reevaluate what they are accessorising with.

Culturally inappropriate accessories
This is a broad point however the two main ‘accessories’ being fouled are Native American Headdresses and Indian Bindis. These are culturally significant traditional wear that has not been perpetuated so you (I’m looking mainly at you Vanessa Hudgens) can ‘complete your look’ in a completely insensitive way.
Bindis are a Hindu tradition said to retain energy, strengthen concentration and represent the Third Eye, which all seems kind of ironic as you pump back those double Vodka Redbulls, surely they are helping you to strengthen your concentration.
As for Native American Headdresses, these hold deeply rooted symbolism to show ones bravery and courage. You are not brave or courageous because you decided to clash patterns.

Flower crowns
For goodness sakes PUT THE FLOWER CROWN DOWN.
These are no longer cute, no longer chic, no longer interesting and i don’t care if you went on Buzzfeed and learnt how to make it yourself. Find something else to make that hasn’t been so done to death that they got their own paragraph instead of being included in the cultural appropriation one.

Over fringing
Fringe is ok. But when you see someone go all crazy with it then you need to approach them with some scissors. Keep it to a clean ‘one garment’ allowance – bag, jacket, skirt etc. Also don’t be that overzealous person who has obnoxiously long fringing, then you become Jairo the Capoeira Teacher flicking bystanders with his ponytail. If you must fringe, fringe responsibly.

Heels
This one does not need explaining. Do not be that person. Don’t be a bloody fool.

Corsets
Why would any even think to wear a lung and movement restricting piece of clothing to an event that generally requires one to move around a lot? It does not look sexy. It looks dumb. You look like a hooker that has time jumped and found yourself front row at Tyler The Creator. Just no.

Underwear as outwear
Time and place people. There is a time and place for underwear. I don’t care if Urban Outfitters suggests it on their ‘Festival Looks’ page, you gotta leave some stuff up to the imagination and i really don’t want to be pressed all up in sweaty flesh because you finally feel comfortable to defy your parents need for you to be fully clothed.

Roller-skates
Cosmopolitan suggested trading in those awful raver fur boots for roller skates. Do not do this. It will end terribly. Whether you look at from the angle of mixing alcohol with having wheels strapped to your feet or the simple observation that primarily festivals are held in grassy, muddy, sloped, outdoor venues. Save it for the promenade.

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Images from: People Style Watch, Southern Fried Chics, The High Tea Cast, Worthy FM.

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